Responsibility and commitment: are these characteristics still important today? Are they taken as seriously as they need to be taken? Today we will look at these two in terms of the roles that men are supposed to play. No matter what your situation is within your relationship, you have responsibilities and you have to be committed, in order to properly carry them out. These responsibilities have a major impact on the people that you are responsible for. So, taking care of these responsibilities will have a massive effect, and not taking care of these responsibilities will also consequently have a massive effect.
Remember And Recognize Responsibility
Due to the declining in moral standards that we face in our society today, men must remember and recognise that they need to be responsible and committed. Whether it is your wife or children, no matter what the situation is, those responsibilities never change.
I remember growing up and watching my grandfather, who is my hero, go about taking care of his responsibilities with full commitment. My grand father married the love of his life, my grandmother, with eight children. Now, I know in today’s society that is nigh impossible to even consider doing. However, my grandfather is not a normal man. I would wait with bating breath for him to say “Come Boi, wi a guh bush guh feed di cow dem”! If you are Jamaican and reading this, then you already know what this means. For the rest of you, it means we were going to the farm to feed the cows. All this would happen before breakfast, and then I had to come back and get ready for school.
I would watch my granddad come home from work on Friday give his wages to my grandma to run the home. I have never seen my grandfather complain and I wish I took that from him, he just knew his role and responsibilities and he just got on with it.
I or my cousins were never short of love or lessons in responsibility and commitment. My grandad was never much of a talker but his actions always spoke volumes and they still do to this day.
I learnt so much about the importance of responsibility and commitment by just watching him go about his business with real purpose.
I leant from my grandfather that If you don’t take care of these responsibilities, then the consequences are absolutely devastating. There is a possibility that your children are going to grow up disrespectful or disobedient. Someone or the other is going to teach them something, so why shouldn’t it be you? Suffice to say that out of the multiple grand and great grandchildren that my grandfather has, I have yet to hear of him being disrespected in any way, I have surely never even thought about doing it.
Teaching children the right things, and giving them the right moral standards is key to their overall wellbeing and success in life. If you have a son, take pride in teaching him how to be a gentleman, how to provide, how to protect, how to lead, and how to nurture. As well as the vital importance of being responsible and committed in a relationship. I know the skills I learnt from watching my grandfather as I was growing are now serving me in my marriage.
As I said earlier, my grandmother runs the home and grandfather is clear on his role and responsibilities. My grandmother leading in that respect does not limit my grandfather’s leadership. Him empowering her makes love him even more. As a responsible father, you need to make sure you help your son understand how to let their partner lead as well. Your son must understand that it is important that their ego doesn’t get in the way. If you have sons and daughters, then it is up to you to teach them their own value, teach them how to respect and honor themselves. So, whenever they get into relationships, they won’t take anything less than what they deserve. I learnt this from my grandparents.
Become A Role Model For Your Children
You are the first person that your daughter is supposed to fall in love with as a man. She is supposed to learn from you what a real man or manhood is. I like to take my daughters on dates to nice places, thus setting the standard and showing them how much I value, cherish and admire them. I want then to know that they are the best, and they should accept nothing less. I also want them to know that when someone wants to take them out on a date, McDonalds and KFC are not acceptable. So, being responsible and committed in a relationship means it is imperative that you stay at home and that you take care of your responsibilities in order to teach them this. In certain situations, and because of the society we live in, it is not always possible to stay at home. But your responsibilities don’t change. You’re still responsible for your children, for leading them and teaching them the right things.
Men are not only supposed to help financially as it is predetermined in most cultures. But that isn’t all. Your responsibilities are vast; you’re supposed to be the leader, teacher, mentor, counsellor, and more. Being responsible and committed in a relationship means that you understand your role. It’s not that mothers cannot do this, because they do all the time. However, children look at fathers in a completely different way and we all need to come to terms with that. I know my children are looking everything I do and learning all the time. A man’s responsibilities are different from a woman’s responsibilities, and they’re both playing different roles. So team work whether you are together or not is the best way to give your children the best foundation. This will require humility, understanding, as well as being laser focus on the job at hand, which is to give your children the best environment from which to flourish and grow.
Forgetting your responsibilities as a man has a lot of consequences. It will put more burden on your wife who will eventually start feeling like it is unfair to her. This can eventually lead to a stifle in the relationship as both partners will start feeling neglected over time.
The Mental, Spiritual, Emotional, And Physical Wellbeing
As a man, you’re responsible for your family’s mental, spiritual, emotional, and physical wellbeing. You should know that you cannot blanket your entire family’s wellbeing in one-go and say you’re done with it. Every member of your family is different and you need to make sure that you connect with them individually. My son likes games, my younger daughter like dance, my older daughter is foodie and my wife is nerd. I have give each of them what that need in order to provide the best environment for them to flourish and grow.
It is up to you to understand the different nuances between the people within your family unit. It is a two-way street. If you don’t fuel up the relationship, then it’s going to be difficult for your partner to do the same. So, always make sure to take care of your partner and your children. Make sure that you’re providing that moral foundation for your children.
It is your job to make sure that no matter what, you’re going to be there for them. This goes for your children and your wife. You are the foundation that they will use to become everything they want on.
Committing Yourself To Provide, Protect, And Lead Your Family
Now, let’s talk about the importance of being committed. Providing for your family is what I was taught growing up and it is an important lesson, I believe a man should provide for his family. However I also understand that times have changed since I was growing up. Providing isn’t only about money, it is much more than that. It is about providing them mentally, emotionally, physically, and spiritually. Back when I was little boy, the idea was that a man’s responsibilities were to pay the bills. I was lucky in that my grandfather did so much more than just pay bills. However, not every child was as fortunate as I was in this respect.
Protecting your family from anything destructive is also a key part of your job, and that is the second bit of commitment. Whether it is mental, physical, spiritual, emotional, or any other form, you need to make sure that you protect your family no matter what. With my children, I risk assess most things. I have had to put even family in their place, in no uncertain terms, when they have put my children at risk, and the very same when it comes to my wife. I take no prisoners when it comes to keeping them safe. You’re supposed to make sure that they are safe, and you are supposed to make sure to teach them how to keep themselves safe. Helping them understand how to protect themselves also helps build their confidence. I teach my wife and children boxing and they all love it.
You’re required to protect your family from all sorts of harm. This also includes keeping them away from toxic people. You can’t bring your wife or your children into a situation where people are toxic. If you know they are toxic, then you should avoid getting them hurt by those toxic people or the environment.
Lastly, you have to lead our family on the right and proper path in a way that will elevate them. You’re supposed to create the right environment for them so that they can see clearly where they are going. Leadership is sometimes about clearing the path, it is also about going from the back to protect them from anything that’s coming. That way, leadership is sometimes in the middle so that you can navigate what is going on from there. So, leadership is important. It is also important for you to allow them to lead from time to time. When it is their time, you have to let them take the reins. Whether it is your children or wife, allow them to lead while you sit back and give them the foundation from which they can do this. This builds their confidence and self worth which will serve them well in life.
What were your examples of men being committed to their responsibilities when you were growing up? Do you think this has changed over the years? Let me know in the comments.