Emotional Intimacy and health communication are key components for the cultivation of a healthy, happy and loving relationship that will stand the test of time. Today’s i will be breaking down how to build emotional intimacy and healthy communication in yours. I want to focus on this aspect because sometimes, as men, it gets difficult for us to communicate with our spouses. Many times it is because we do not want to talk, mostly because either we’re weary or we want to sit quietly. And, if your wife is eager to know what is going on, then she’s always going to be asking you what’s wrong. But sometimes, you just don’t want to have conversations. This is because men are highly capable of sitting down and thinking about nothing- it is a real thing. 

Understanding The Different Nuances That We Have

It is important to understand that men can easily sit alone and not think about anything. Sometimes things might be wrong, and if this is the case, then if the man loves you, he will communicate that with you. But many times, he might not be thinking about anything. This is where we need to understand the different nuances that men and women have. See some more details here https://andreoferguson.com/2020/04/05/are-men-intimidated-by-successful-women/

Women generally like to communicate, have their feeling heard, and make sure that they’re understood. So, men, even if it is that part of the day or time when you don’t feel like talking and just watch football or do anything else mindlessly, you need to learn how to get yourself out of that mindset if your partner wishes to talk to you. Give her your undivided attention until she feels heard, then lovingly express to her that would like some quiet time. This will greatly enhance the level of emotional intimacy in your relationship as she will feel much more valued and understood. It causes you a lot less stress as well.

Make Your Partner Feel Safe And Heard Through Better Communication And Emotional Intimacy

Don’t push her away. Emotional intimacy and communication are about making her feel safe and loved. If she is trying to talk to you about something important to her, you have to develop the kind of selflessness that is required so that she can feel like she can come to you at any time and any place for anything. But doing so requires a lot of patience and effort on your side. This is something that you have to do as a loving caring partner to your wife. 

You need to create that environment, that safety where your wife understands that you don’t always want to talk, but he also works hard to always give me time to listen, understand, counsel, lead, and guide. 

Sometimes all you have to do is listen, because brothers, that’s all you need to do. You just have to make sure that you’re there for her. Make sure that you’re there listening and understanding. But this doesn’t mean you don’t focus on what they’re saying by paying attention to other things. You have to actively listen. Listen so that you can understand. This is when she will feel that connection with you; the love and compassion she should feel with you. This is how you create that safety net for her which will take your relationship to higher heights and give both of you the deep emotional intimacy that will transform your relationship.

Letting Her Know When It Is “Quiet Time” Communicates Emotional Intimacy

The same goes for women. Your man doesn’t always want to talk. It’s normal to not want to talk. But I live with somebody who wants to talk, and she needs to know that I am okay, so she will ask me this. So, whatever I am thinking about, I will try to say it to my wife. I will say something along the lines of “Baby, you know what, for a couple of hours I just need quiet time.”, this is something that we have in our relationship where I just say it is quiet time. 

There’s no specific time limit to this, but your wife will surely ask you once you start behaving a certain way as to whether it’s quiet time like my wife does with me. But sometimes, they might not know. You will be thinking about a series of things, and it’s up to you to go and tell her that it is quiet time. If you’re anything like me, then you have many things going on in your mind. When this happens, I go up to my wife and say, “it’s quiet time.” and almost every time, she thanks me for letting her know. 

This is where you need to get to. Open clear communication so that she doesn’t have to work out if something is wrong and keep questioning you about what’s wrong. While she might be concerned about what you’re feeling, you might start getting annoyed by her constant questioning. You can easily manage this by letting her know that it is quiet time or that you need some time to work out a few things, and when you’re done, you’ll come back to her. 

Tips On How To Create Deeper Emotional Intimacy And Communicate Better

You need to make sure that you’re actively listening, caring, showing interest in what she’s saying. Sometimes, she might tell you things that do not interest you that much, but you need to listen to her because what is important to her must be important to you as well. 

Over time, you get to understand each other better. For example, if you’re anything like me, then you can make use of another trick of mine. I tell my wife to give me the short version of things. Over the course of our relationship, she has understood that I think differently as I have explained it to her that I consume information differently. 

While giving detailed information to her friends and mom might be really cool since they all love hearing all the details, but I just want the big bits. So, she tells me the big bits, and we have a conversation based on them. This way, she knows that I am interested in what she has to say, and it’s important for her to give information in a way that I can palate it. 

There’s no point in giving information to each and not receive it in the right way. Communication is something you bot receive respectfully, with love, compassion, understanding, care, and interest that is required from it. See the full discussion on YouTube https://youtu.be/X7M2jW7JtKc